this whole second baby thing...i really have no idea what to do. i go back and forth, struggle internally and sometimes externally, and i just don't know what's right.
on the one hand, i feel like my daughter should have a sibling. parents with only children tell me all the time that they wish they'd given their child a playmate, that vacations would be more fun, that even quiet time would be better for the kid.
most only children loved being only children and wouldn't've wanted a sibling. most...but certainly not all. i know a few only children who still hate that they don't have siblings.
but then there's me. i'm already in waaaaay over my head with this whole parenting thing. i love my daughter more than anything. _she_ is my number one bucket list item: the exact baby i always dreamed of having is the baby she is. from her personality to her love of hugs and snuggles to her adventurous spirit and chatty little boca, she is my wildest dream in the flesh. and life with her is so much better than life without.
but it's also harder.
life is more difficult to schedule and manage, it's way more complicated to travel, and everything is unpredictable from one day to the next. all things that make me very uncomfortable. to add another tiny human in to the mix may very well topple what little sanity i've managed to cling to.
but is it unfair to deprive the love of my life of a sibling?
i have no answer...and don't know where to find one.
~k
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